LeBron and Akron

Excerpt:

LeBron was hanging from the monkey bars by his knees. Gale wanted to take all five kids back in the condition he took them in, too. “What if I just came for the day then? I could come out tomorrow morning and spend the day with you. I’ll leave before they go to bed. Unless you want me to sneak back in through a window.”

Lisa giggled. “You’re bad. Aren’t you shooting today?”

“I was on set Monday and yesterday.”

“So you’re still getting a lot of days.”

“Sure, but we were talking about tomorrow since I can’t come tonight.” The Pop Tarts box they kept their savings in still had money in it and it was after the first of the month.

“I know. Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“Why would I mind? Other than the fact that I’m dying to touch you and we can’t get any time alone.”

“Me, too. LeBron, cut that out.” The boy was still hanging from his knees and now he was grabbing the other kids’ heads.

“Who’s LeBron?” Lisa asked.

“One of the kids I’m watching. LeBron, one more time and you’re five minutes with me.”

“Why are you babysitting?”

“One of my neighbors runs a little daycare out of her house. I pitch in on days when I’m home.”

“Aww.”

“The kids are nice.” Except when they were being little shits. LeBron had one of the poofs Chita’s hair was up in. “LeBron! Right here, right now. Gentlemen do not pull lady’s hair. Lisa, can I call you—“

Chita jerked away from LeBron. His fingers were tangled in her hair and when she moved, he lost is hold on the monkey bars. He hit the ground with a sickening thump followed by a screech.

 

I live in Akron, Ohio and our favorite son is LeBron James so I had to name a kid after him. Then, because I’ve spent way too much time with little kids, I had to make him a little shit. No insult meant to King James, but I needed a little boy with a lot of personality and that was the name I picked. I have another funny, related story. When I was selling all my stuff before I moved back from Abu Dhabi a bunch of Filipino guys came around to buy. They noticed my inflatable blimp hanging from the ceiling (which was gifted to me by the blimp crew after I supplied them with Smithsonian Magazines when the blimp was the cover story). They pointed out the blimp and I said that I was from Akron. The guy who had done all the talking lit up, “Do you know LeBron James?” Yeah, we meet for coffee all the time <eyeroll>. I didn’t say that, but I did tell them that LeBron used to ride past my house every summer when he did his bike-a-thon. They were happy with that.

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